In what many are calling “the most glamorous 10 minutes in suborbital history,” Katy Perry successfully rocketed into space aboard Blue Origin’s latest all-female mission, NS-31. While the journey only lasted long enough for a bathroom break and a quick existential crisis, Perry made sure it would be one for the history books — or at least for her Instagram Reels.
The singer, dressed in a sparkly flight suit that could blind a satellite, joined a crew of impressive women including journalist Gayle King, rocket engineer Aisha Bowe, and Jeff Bezos’ fiancée Lauren Sánchez, proving once and for all that space is no longer the exclusive domain of science nerds and men named Buzz.
According to eyewitnesses (and by eyewitnesses we mean Katy’s social media manager), Perry floated weightlessly for approximately 3.6 minutes while singing What a Wonderful World, although insiders claim the rest of the crew had requested Please Don’t Stop the Music and are still recovering from the confusion.
The high point of the mission? When Katy pulled out a daisy mid-flight in tribute to her daughter, Daisy Dove, because nothing says “motherly love” like a delicate flower hurled into microgravity next to a floating snack bar and a mildly nauseous Gayle King.
Critics quickly pounced on the spectacle, calling it “frivolous,” “performative,” and “yet another thing celebrities are taking away from engineers.” In response, Perry calmly returned to Earth, kissed the ground, and immediately packed her daughter’s lunch, thus achieving the modern mother trifecta: pop icon, space traveler, and sandwich technician.
NASA officials, watching from afar with a mix of admiration and secondhand embarrassment, commented:
“We’ve landed rovers on Mars. But this… this is somehow louder.”
Blue Origin hasn’t confirmed their next crew, but rumors suggest it may include Lady Gaga, Elon Musk’s AI twin, and a golden retriever with a GoPro.
One thing is clear: Katy came, she floated, and she conquered. And now the bar for celebrity overachievement is officially… out of this world. 🌎✨👩‍🚀